Top Ten--May 2010

10—Things I never anticipated having to say:
• A, please stop dipping your pickle in the apple juice.
• K, please stop beating your brother with a monkey.
• A, please take that stinky fly swatter out of your mouth. (Ew!)

9—Isaac’s descriptive abilities abound. Observe:
M: Who else came to play at W’s?
I: D and some kid I don’t know.
M: Well, what did he look like?
I: Ummmmm, he had a square head.

You’d think that would have narrowed things down a bit, wouldn’t you? Still couldn’t figure it out.

8—FHE favorites: Isaac conducting our songs like he’s landing an airplane, Adam’s joyful shouting through our entire lesson, Lucy playing musical seats to avoid having to sit by her brothers and her brothers hopping right around after her. There are more, but frankly, if I think about it too much I start to wonder what the point is.

7—Adam’s finicky ways: the kid eats the equivalent of one grain of rice at dinner and expects snacks as soon as we clean up. He doesn’t get them so he resorts to pleading. “I am bewy, bewy hungwy and I want some cheelos, pleeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaasssssssssssssssssssssse?” Not happening, son, but props for trying.

6-Kye: Can I have a friend over?
Zach: No.
Kye: Please?
Zach: No
Kye: Give me five good reasons why.
Zach: I don’t need to give you five reasons. I need to give you one reason, and the reason is “no.”

5—Hannah (my niece): I’m so glad I’m being babysat by someone who appreciates bologna.
Glad you like it here, Han. I’ll keep the bologna in stock if that’s what it takes to keep you coming back.

4—M: Isaac, do you even LISTEN to the words I say?
I: Uh, huh . . . but I don’t want to do them.

3—Good thing you can’t get drunk from whine, or I’d be three sheets to the wind for the majority of my waking hours. *Sigh*

2—I: Aaaaaack! I swallowed it wong. It’s in my hawt . . . . (pause) but it’s still beating!!! Whew. (complete with hand swiping brow.)

Man, I love that kid.

1—Yeehawzers! Summer break is here again! Had I any foresight for the last day of school, I might have gone to L&K’s classrooms to pick them up so we could get a picture of them with their teachers. . . . Except that I was at home instead, planning a super summer fun party for that afternoon because I was so stinking excited for summer vacation. Eh. Maybe next year.